Posted by: navalanche | January 15, 2013

The new year starts with the same old issues

The tough thing about the Christmas holidays is that it is the time of year when my bad habits are likely to find me indulging in self-flagellation.  2012 began like every new year, I start full of hope and promise and end the year feeling defeated.  And if I wallow too long, I dwell on my behaviors and unmet expectations.  But I am by nature full of hope and after shedding a few big tears privately, at my lowest points and on more than one occasion, I realize that I am wasting time and energy if I internalize and withdraw.  It not just about me either, the things I do affect others.  I am fortunate that I wake every day and find that I still believe in me.  I might not have found my way but I work on improving things every day.

That said, the holidays are not about my clutter and unfinished business, it’s about family and all the crazy that makes us special to one another.  Gabe was home from school and so it was time to take a break.  This year the holidays were quieter than most for me, probably because I was working, and there was plenty to keep me busy.

We spent a day up north at the lake for Christmas with Mike’s side of the family. I took a few pictures but as I didn’t have the chance to check with everyone to see if they had any objections to me using the photos here, I’ll just use a picture that Gabe took at the shore that day.

lakesunset

Everyone on my side of the family had scheduling issues so my niece Erika hosted a small get together.  It was perfect arrangement as Christmas is really all about Jaxon and he had a chance to unwrap all his presents at home.  People came and went all day and space only became tight during the few times when her apartment reached full capacity.  Nonetheless, Jaxon found space to play Super Heroes with the guys.

superheroxmas

As for Christmas at my house….

I could not have a Christmas tree, not surprisingly as I haven’t had one the last few years. I did have a chance to take a family picture to commemorate the holiday at my brother-in-law’s.  Mike didn’t understand the concept and knocked the angel off the top and nearly toppled the tree.

timtree

The neighbors sent over plenty of goodies but my favorite was the cookie that the little ones across the street made special for Mike.

cookiemike

We exchanged our gag gifts.  Joel received a smaller amount of silly items than usual. One was a Blenko glass fish with a vintage rooster salt shaker inside.  The goal is for the gift to make no sense at all and this works for me.

joelfish

Things must be officially back to normal with my sister Kat as Mike received 2 Santa blowmolds.  Mike was not happy as he despises them and much as I like them.  Kat thinks she sooo funny.

blowmoldsantas

As space was at a premium at my place, we had to find things to do away from home. Joel had given me a new camera for Christmas and we experimented with during a trip to the mall.  There is a new Target opening soon and I am very fond of Target. Unfortunately, I don’t allow myself to stop in any more as it is another addiction.

targetmalla

targetmallb

targetmallc

A classmate of Gabe’s, Mark, came to town for the day.  I made arrangements for him to stay at my sister Sue’s as he would not fit at my house.  The nieces and nephews were thrilled by the idea and ended up having a slumber party while he was there. I’m sure Mark did not get much rest.  As Mark is a fan of public transit systems, bus engines in particular (who knew), so as per his request, we dropped him off at a station the next morning so he could take a bus to the airport.

busstop

Even with the clutter, we still had company.  The nieces and nephews take time to stop in and find just enough space for me to take their pictures.

athomea

athomeb

All good things come to an end.  Gabe is back in California and the nieces and nephews are back in school.

Clutter wise, I feel I am approaching critical mass, by my definition, the point at which my home can take on no more clutter without imploding on itself.

Once again, I feel like I’m starting over.


Responses

  1. Except that you aren’t starting over because you’ve been doing this for a while. You are just keeping it going and that’s fine. Happy new year!

    • I really spent some time, a few weeks actually, thinking about your comment. As hard as I try to stay positive, I say the words but in my mind, I doubt myself. And as I write, that negativity lies right below the surface and interferes with my progress. I try to look at what I’ve done right but dwell on my past mistakes. It’s easy because there is so much to do and habits to break. Between your message and a great pep talk from my son, over the last few weeks, I approached everything with a “I can do anything if I really want it, no excuses” attitude. Things are still moving at a snail’s pace but I feel so much happier. Thanks for the encouragement!!!

      • Aw I am so happy you had a breakthrough. I will keep rooting for you always

  2. i expected at least one photo of the gateway to the great wall of navah in this post. alas, i shall have to wait, along with all your other many worldwide followers, for it to appear in a future exciting installment of your adventures amid the clutter.

    • I had hoped to start the great wall of Navah by the end of January by alas it did not happen. I believe I will be starting it this month.


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